There are certain things that niggle at you all day; things that the etiquette of the workplace – or lack of opportunity – obstruct your dealing with them. Some folk won’t poo at work, others won’t fart (even in the privacy of the toilet cubicle, or in a quiet corner of the office when there’s nobody around).

I don’t suffer from such inhibitions – I’ve tried to hold back and it’s too painful, I just end up making myself poorly.

I spent the day being very distracted by a couple of things, however, they were the type of things that you simply HAVE to save up till hometime:

1. Squeezing spots: Let’s face it, you don’t want to spend the whole day with massively disfigured face because you’ve been having a go at your beaners. It’s a shame really, because the lighting and mirrors in the works’ toilets are usually excellent for this task.

2. Plucking facial hairs: I’m not talking eyebrows here.

I’d spent the entire day conscious of an inflating spot on my face and a fusewire-like hair growing from my lovely mole.

First task on returning home from work was therefore:

Secondly, it didn’t look much above the skin, but these bastards are like icebergs: just look at how long it was underneath!

Getting those tasks out of the way mean you can start to relax for the evening. Aaahhhhhh….