You know that thing from the 1970s when, for one reason or another, foreign films were always dubbed into English, as opposed to the translation being provided by subtitles? I think this might be related to the sorts of foreign films that I used to see back then; they were mainly spaghetti westerns, whose audience probably wouldn’t have appreciated having to attempt reading while trying to keep up with the twists and turns of the intricate plot and character interactions. Anyway, the thing about dubbed films that really bugged me was the way the characters’ mouths didn’t move in time to what was being said. I’d go further and say that it really got on my tits. Of course, a spaghetti western’s dialogue was limited to the odd grunt from Clint and Lee van Cleef, and the occasional “This is my moment of stardom” from a young Spanish actress playing the whore in the only saloon bar for miles, so there was never much of a mismatch between mouths moving and sound coming out.

These days, if I’m watching a foreign film, it has subtitles, which I like. I’m sure the translations are pretty faithful, since I find myself enjoying the film and generally understanding everything that’s going on. Watching a film in its original format is also often much better than watching it after Hollywood have given the story its own particular brand of sparkle (The Ring, The Grudge, etc). So that’s good.

Now, I have a thing for the cinema – I really don’t like it that much: too expensive, too many other people, too dark, too loud, too not at home. This being the case, I’d much rather watch a film at home: no rushing to get to the cinema on time; snacks to hand; pause button; volume control. It doesn’t take too long for a film to come out on DVD these days, but if you really can’t wait that long, all sorts of cheeky people put them on internet even before they’re released at the cinema and you sometimes come across them and download and burn them to DVD by accident. Sometimes though, when you come to watch them, the sound is hopelessly out of sync with the image.

What’s all that about then? It’s really annoying and I’m certainly not going to watch a film at the pictures when they can’t sync the sound properly. No way Jose!

And why don’t people who make DVD players or TVs come up with some sort of technology where you can re-phase the sound with the image?

Politics
I might get political. I’m thinking of getting involved in politics so I can feel like I’m doing my bit in the fight against the systematic erosion of the British people’s civil liberties.

Here are some of the laws and proposed laws (quoted from Philip Pullman, writing in The Times) that we have had forced on us under the Labour Government over the past ten years or so:

It is inconceivable to me that a waking nation in the full consciousness of its freedom would have allowed its government to pass such laws as the Protection from Harassment Act (1997), the Crime and Disorder Act (1998), the Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act (2000), the Terrorism Act (2000), the Criminal Justice and Police Act (2001), the Anti-Terrorism, Crime and Security Act (2001), the Regulation of Investigatory Powers Extension Act (2002), the Criminal Justice Act (2003), the Extradition Act (2003), the Anti-Social Behaviour Act (2003), the Domestic Violence, Crime and Victims Act (2004), the Civil Contingencies Act (2004), the Prevention of Terrorism Act (2005), the Inquiries Act (2005), the Serious Organised Crime and Police Act (2005), not to mention a host of pending legislation such as the Identity Cards Bill, the Coroners and Justice Bill, and the Legislative and Regulatory Reform Bill

We are the most watched nation in the developed world and nobody seems to be doing anything about it. We are turning into a Police State, where anti-terrorism laws can be used against people taking photographs in public places. We’re not allowed to gather to protest in numbers greater than two at a time. We have our DNA stolen and stored on a database if we are arrested, and the information retained even if no charges are brought – there are about one million innocent people, some never even charged with an offence, whose DNA is stored.

Our Information Commissioner, the man put in place to try to ensure that privacy laws are adhered to, wrote an excellent piece in The Times too. In it, he warned that proposals to allow widespread data sharing between Whitehall and the private sector were too far-reaching and that plans to create a giant database of every telephone call, e-mail and text message risked turning everyone into a suspect. “In the last 10 or 15 years a great deal of surveillance in public and private places has been extended without sufficient thought to the risks and consequences,” said Mr Thomas, 59. “Our society is based on liberty and democracy. I do not want to see excessive surveillance hardwired into British society.”

Nothing to hide, nothing to fear? What happens when you don’t want the government to know which websites you visit, who you phone, who you e-mail? We have everything to fear.

I know it’s hypocritical for somebody to complain about lack of privacy and then go and spout off on the internet, but how long before we’re not allowed freedom of speech in these sorts of forums before the Police come knocking when what we write is deemed inapprorpriate?

Will the people do anything? No, I doubt it. I’m sat here whinging about it and doing fuck all. But no more, I’m going to be stand up and be counted! I’m off to join the militant wing of the Women’s Institute.